Detroit North Terminal dump

Discussion in 'Aviation Passenger Security in the USA' started by KrazyKat, Apr 1, 2013.

  1. KrazyKat

    KrazyKat Original Member

    Detroit airport terminal reopens after suspicious device removed

    Of course the device wasn't removed until all the passengers in the terminal were. April Fools fun with the TSA...
    So scary and suspicious a device, TSA dare not describe it.
    From comments:
    And there are more reports describing the terminal dump, for a device now described as "a decorative item":
  2. RB

    RB Founding Member

    Probably a laser pointer.
  3. Caradoc

    Caradoc Original Member

    KrazyKat likes this.
  4. RB

    RB Founding Member

    TSA: When it absolutely, positively has to be FUBAR today.


    TSA: We put the F in FUBAR.
    Caradoc and KrazyKat like this.
  5. KrazyKat

    KrazyKat Original Member

    Probably a scary paperweight.
    All the authorities were called. Detroit Metro issued a press release praising the interagency deployment, all triggered by the TSA panic at the carry-on X-ray screen. The news reports "no one was hurt.":rolleyes:
  6. Caradoc

    Caradoc Original Member

    KrazyKat likes this.
  7. Mike

    Mike Founding Member Coach

    Or a fancy wristwatch. :eek:
  8. FaustsAccountant

    FaustsAccountant Original Member

    I vote a tiny eyeglass screwdriver.
  9. DeafBlonde

    DeafBlonde Original Member

    A cupcake in a jar.:cupcake::eek:
  10. KrazyKat

    KrazyKat Original Member

    Or a decorative vibrator.
    An encased mini-steampunk Tesla coil perhaps?
    No matter. Planes left without their passengers safely.
    phoebepontiac likes this.
  11. Rugape

    Rugape Original Member

    Hey, some of those water filters look like a pipe bomb on xray - dead serious.
  12. Caradoc

    Caradoc Original Member

    Sure they do, Rugape. Just like all TSA employees are "federalized" and "professionalized," and the Ekman Behavioral Detection stuff has basis in science.

    Oh, wait. No, those are lies, too.
  13. Rugape

    Rugape Original Member

    Yeah, some of them really do, especially on xray where you can't see the actual item(s)...
  14. KrazyKat

    KrazyKat Original Member

    Since we'll have to wait for the scary item at DTW to be trotted out, what's more likely, a, b, or c?:
    Your guess?

    a) radiation detector
    b) dildo
    c) lunchbox
    Frank likes this.
  15. RB

    RB Founding Member

    OK, script for using all three above items at one time.:D
  16. Caradoc

    Caradoc Original Member

    Sure they do. I note that the X-rays of the item in question are not provided for comparison.

    TSA employees are stupid. That's why they do things like strip all of the lens caps (front and rear) from a collection of lenses, making a sloppy pile of them before touching the front and rear glass elements of the lenses with their fingers before spending several minutes trying to unscrew a circular polarizer, barking at the owner when they try to point out how to do it, and leaving the pile of dirty glass and caps for the owner to reassemble.

    A plastic pipe with a ceramic filter in it doesn't look anything like a pipe bomb on an X-ray, except to someone whose sole remaining potential for "earning" a paycheck is predicated on making the general public believe that they're in extreme danger at all times from dem eeeeebil tewowwists.
  17. Caradoc

    Caradoc Original Member

    I think it's more likely...

    D) A cupcake in a jar.

  18. N965VJ

    N965VJ Original Member

    And pump bottles of shampoo look like IEDs. Good thing the TSA makes extensive use of Explosive Trace Portals / Explosive Trace Detection. :rolleyes:
  19. RB

    RB Founding Member

    Caradoc likes this.
  20. Frank

    Frank Original Member

    You, sir, are a sick and twisted individual. I like that.

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