....sweaters, mittens, hats and scarves knitted by doting grannies. ...a crushed flea from the pubes of your beloved, tucked in your snuffbox for safekeeping. ...a home-made tinned fruitcake soaked in rum and shipped to your trench on the front lines. ...your favorite pair of bell-bottom jeans, embellished from hip to frayed hem with embroidery. What's my point? These tender expressions are sometimes practical, sometimes ridiculous, can be quite intimate, and time, convenience and expense are no object. Their nature depends on the living conditions of the giver and the recipient. Which brings me to the here and now. Our federal executive branch has hired thugs and pedophiles to juggle male citizen's testicles and prod apart female citizen's labias. Our complicit judiciary and legislature has done nothing to halt this abuse. Grannies can't visit grandchildren without the threat of goons rooting around in their Depends. Grandchildren can't visit Grandpa without facing a gauntlet of pedophiles. Businesspersons can't complete their trips without having their private parts made public. Lovers can't vacation without enduring unwanted sexual contact with perverted strangers. What's the loving gift in such a culture? How about "Pistole-Pants?" How about hand-made under-drawers which feature a padded, form-fitting inner layer to protect the wearer's private parts, a set of cabbage-patch-doll-styled "life-like" public-parts for TSA agents to fondle, and an outer layer of some popular style of underwear. They could be lovingly cobbled together from various popular styles of undies and items from the fabric and craft stores. The INTERNET knitting, quilting and sewing forums could supply never-ending design variations. Contemplate the beauty of such a wide-spread practice of "cooperation" and "creative coping" with the TSA's groping practices. It would break them. You know it would. Please excuse spelling and grammar errors. I'm under the gun right now. Just thought I'd share.