Howdy Folks. Some of you should slap some sense in me for keeping this job. After 43 years of air travel, I should expect some of these things, but it still amazes me. I thought I'd share my recent trip with you. Work Order says fly into Toronto (YYZ). Install 2 new machines & start-up. 15 Days. Leave Houston (IAH) on Sunday. Got my usual testicle & prostate inspection. Arrive in Toronto Immigratrion. Work order says 15 days. Letter of introduction says 3 to 5 days. <here we go> 2 Hours in immigration, 5 phone calls. and I'm free to continue. Get my rental car and head for the hotel. The first week of work was uneventful. Plant was closed on Sunday, so I had a one day layover. What to do? My wife suggested I visit my mother in Buffalo, NY. (1 1/4 hour drive.) Mom is 85 years old, and I haven't been there for 3 years, so I shuffle off to Buffalo, visit for about 5 hours, and head back. Arrive at the border in Niagara Falls, NY. Letter of introduction is no longer valid. <here we go> I need new papers. I'm bounced out of Canada, and get a room in NF. My office e-mails new papers, I print them, and head back to the border. They OK the paper work, but let me sit there for 3 hours. I didn't know how long it would take me to get back into the country, so I had called the hotel in Brampton, and asked them to check me out, and keep my luggage until I returned. I headed back to the hotel to check back in, only to find they were now fully booked, so off to another hotel, check in, and rush in to work. Got a call from my company. They're pulling me off the job and replacing me. I'm now headed home for 6 hours, and then jumping a flight to Paris for an emergency job. Headed to Toronto Airport. US Airways. Keosk won't check me in. <here we go> $90.00 for my tool box. I tell the ticket agent, I'm elite, and never charged for overweight. He says I'm wrong. OK 90 bucks on the company card. Then he hands me my boarding pass. *SSSS* WHAT????? I haven't seen these in years. First was US Customs. (yes, you go through US Customs, at the Toronto Airport.) When my passport picture was taken, I had a Bluetooth Ear piece in my ear and the picture was used. <here we go> Now they're questioning is the picture is valid. No one has questioned this in years, and I told them that the passport was issued like this, so what's the problem. So I take the ear piece from my pocket, put it in my ear, and my identification is accepted. Now off to Security. Canadian Security is not much better then US, but the pat-downs are less evasive IMO. Got my pat-down, luggage torn apart. What's this? <here we go> They found my laser pointer, I use for job training. Is this OK?? I informed them that a new security device has been invented to protect pilots. It's called a Cockpit Door!!!! Well, I guess it's OK. Wow! I'm sitting at the gate waiting for my flight. This story may be continued, and maybe not. We'll see how it goes.